One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through.
Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters – whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished.

Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents’ house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship ended all of a sudden? You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened.

You can tell yourself you won’t take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your sister.
Everyone is finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill.

Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away.

That is why it is so important (however painful it may be!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home.

Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts – and getting rid of certain memories also means making some room for other memories to take their place.
Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them.

Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose. Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood.

Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.

Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the “ideal moment.”

Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back.
Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person – nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need.
This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important.

Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life.

Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust.

Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.

 

Via Paulo Coelho’s Blog

 

 

Via SayingImages

When you have someone in your corner, rooting for you, suddenly you feel that everything is possible.

Thank you, S.

Who am I, really?

Lately, I’ve been asking myself that question, a lot. It gets confusing each time I ask myself.

I’m a person. A girl. A woman. A daughter. A sister. A friend. A wife. A daughter-in-law.

I’m everything and nothing all at once. How could that be?

“Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle.”

- Plato -

It’s not that bad. Marriage.

Though in the earliest days, I was a bit stressed with the living arrangements.
Things turned out to be better as we slowly settled into a routine.
Routine is good. Too many changes/chaos could make me go crazy.
I like my life to be orderly. As orderly as my jumbled up mind pretend to be.

Missing the times when I could just be with myself.
Missing the times spend with families. Just hanging out in front of the telly on our sick-green couch.
Missing the times with friends. Just hanging out, spending the whole day together, from sun up till sun down.

Saying so, I’m enjoying the bits and pieces of this new life though.
Loving the bits where I could see and talk to him whenever.
Loving the silly games we play to annoy each other.
Loving the warm hugs & real kisses, instead of the XOXOXO.

I’m blessed and content (for the time being, heh ;) )

Clock is ticking. Calendar pages flipped of. Dates on the calendar crossed off. The DAY is getting nearer.

I have to shout this to the WorldWideWeb world,

“I’m sad for all the people and things I have to leave behind. Although we say things won’t change, they will change. You and I both know it.”

“Wedding preps are not all fun. It’s difficult when people ask you how’s the preps going, when you at that moment don’t feel like doing any of it coz it consumes your spare time so much.”

“No one wants to hear a bride-to-be pre wedding blues rants. All they expect to hear is how happy you are that you’re getting hitched. How’s your wedding preps is going.”

“I want advice, people. How to survive the godzillabridezilla mode until the DAY itself or how to go through life after marriage or how to relax when I rant like mad about the neverending lists that I’m constantly updating.”

I am afraid to say all this to people for fear that they will not understand these pre-wedding blues that I’m having. . I just want a little bit of TLC to get through all this.

I heart this.  I wish to skip the whole she-bang but I can’t. Emak would kill me. So here I am trying to ‘enjoy’ the researching, planning, decision making, shopping and what’s not. Pray that someone or anything wouldn’t get killed in the process ;)

For 2010, I want to stop self-sabotage by procastination.

Enough said :)

I thought I was over it but I’m not.  Honestly, I’m still bitter about  it. There, I said it.

I blurted out that I’m still sad/upset about the whole  thing. And a colleague said that I do at least gain something from the whole experience. I agree but what I’m trying to say is that, I just can’t forget the whole thing and dismissed it just as another learning experience.

It was truly a learning experience, an eye opener, I would honestly say. But as he keep on pushing the good that come out of the whole thing, I started to feel angry. Fortunately, I didn’t burst out or anything because what’s the point? I told myself silently, let’s just agree to disagree. I don’t think that he could truly understand the disappointment and the frustration I felt after the whole thing. 

I know that he has the good intention to make me see that the it was not such a bad thing. There were good things that I’ve gained and experienced.

However, throughout the whole conversation, I got this feeling that somehow, he’s saying that maybe I am not suitable for my job. Because that’s what we do. We experiment. 

After lunch, I went over the whole conversation in my head. Maybe I was being immature about the whole thing. Being defensive over things that I should have gotten over with when I should be moving on with my life, professionally and emotionally. 

I do know now that it’s difficult to truly understand what people had gone through. Although this particular experience of mine wasn’t truly a life shattering or heart breaking, it does give me some insight on how people would always want to shove their opinions down your throat without fully trying to understand what had happened to you. The unspoken words of what truly happened to them and what they really feel.

Indeed, it is very difficult to be a good listener. To just listen without judging, without bias and most importantly, to listen with empathy.

Sometimes, people just need to be heard. Not to be told what they should or should not feel.

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